Frontier(s) - At 'Dem Flicks w\ Malcolm

As long as we recognize Lucas is washed up and most TV sucks, we'll all get along fine.
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Malcolm
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Joined: Fri May 21, 2004 1:04 pm
Location: Minneapolis

Post by Malcolm »

Yes, you read that title right. Apparently, French horror films've run out of titles made only of letters & are adding in random bits of punctuation or linguistic syntax just because.

This flick originally got an NC-17 rating, otherwise it would've been one of the "films after dark" or "films to die for" or whatever in '07.

Picture every survivalist horror movie from the original "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" on. Take every wacky premise from those that you can & shove them into about 100 minutes.

Here's the premise ... the newly-elected (obviously pseudo-Sarkozy) right-wing gov't has forced the youth of Paris to, I dunno, rebel & commit crimes. Apparently, four disgruntled Parisian twenty-somethings can pull robberies to the tune of a few tens of thousands of dollars w\ no planning, real weapons, or training. Somehow, they escape into the hills & find a motel -- run by serial killing, kidnapping, inbred, Neo-Nazi cannibals. I shit you not. & they arrive in two groups of two. So the first pair is busy getting wasted while the second is just arriving, so you're essentially watching the same movie twice, just w\ different rats running in the maze.

Then the writers get to a spot where they could've mercifully ended this 75-minute cancerous polyp of a flick. Then they tack on another half hour & it appears to be strictly for the purpose of more mindless violence. Normally, I'm a fan of this. But when a family of flesh-eating SS descendants has finished off your buddies, captured you once, & RECAPTURED you another time, you'd figure that they got you beat. One way or another (in the most ludicrous, hackneyed, predictable, & boring, showy ways), all the Neo-Nazis end up meeting their ends in this sequence. If you whack someone on the head w\ an ax & go to turn on the circular saw to finish them off, don't turn your back on them & spend a full five minutes gloating over your victory. Just hit them w\ the fucking ax again.

If you're just in the mood for copious amounts of bloodshed, I suppose this is better than cutting your own wrists. But not by much.




Edited By Malcolm on 1244646989
Diogenes of Sinope: "It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."
Leisher
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Post by Leisher »

My review. Similar conclusion.

You suck at searches. :D
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