Conan the Barbarian - remake

Malcolm · Post by **Malcolm** » Wed Aug 22, 2007 2:16 pm

Post by **Leisher** » Wed Aug 22, 2007 4:27 pm

This has been rumored for years.

There is nothing Hollywood will not desecrate in the name of making a dollar.

Paul · Post by **Paul** » Wed Aug 22, 2007 4:30 pm

I'm not opposed to it.

I've never been a follower of the Conan series/universe, so I see it as a brainless hack & slash film.
As long as they don't try to improve things...

...I just realized that I'm in denial. Sorry.

Malcolm · Post by **Malcolm** » Wed Aug 22, 2007 7:18 pm

Oliver Stone took some liberties w\ Robert E. Howard's story. Robert was kind of fucked in the head.

Post by **GORDON** » Wed Aug 22, 2007 7:42 pm

Picts.

Post by **GORDON** » Fri Nov 02, 2007 12:43 pm

Teaser poster.

http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=38941

Malcolm · Post by **Malcolm** » Fri Nov 02, 2007 12:57 pm

Paul wrote:I've never been a follower of the Conan series/universe, so I see it as a brainless hack & slash film.

It's not supposed to be brainless hack & slash. Started out as pulp fiction. Robert E. Howard was kinda like the Quentin Tarantino of the fantasy genre back in the day. Oliver Stone also hit a fucking homerun w\ the screenplay he wrote. The music (I'm way too lazy to look up who did it) was also perhaps the best score since John Williams's job on "Star Wars."

If, if, if, if, if, if this is given to someone that wants to explore the universe rather than rewrite it, they can avoid a total clusterfuck. I gotta feeling that whoever gets their hands on it will completely miss the point & Conan will be spouting Shakespearian lines or something. Conan is one of those rare title roles where you need someone that can't act that well or can act like they can't act well. What'd he have, like two pages of dialog in the first film delivered in the most direct, brainless manner possible?

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Post by **GORDON** » Fri Nov 02, 2007 1:10 pm

"Who aaaaah you?"

DoctorChaos · Post by **DoctorChaos** » Fri Nov 02, 2007 1:18 pm

I was curious to see what imdb had for the remake so, I did a search for Conan and got this.

Alyssa fucking Milano? Definitely not what I was expecting, but nice to look at nonetheless.

WSGrundy · Post by **WSGrundy** » Fri Nov 02, 2007 1:21 pm

Older space action/fantasy films being remade don't bother me so this is fine. Aren't very many films from that genre that I would have an issue with a remake.

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Malcolm · Post by **Malcolm** » Fri Nov 02, 2007 2:10 pm

WSGrundy wrote:Older space action/fantasy films being remade don't bother me so this is fine. Aren't very many films from that genre that I would have an issue with a remake.

First they remade my horror films, and I was silent. Then they remade my dramatic films, and I was silent still. Then they remade my comedies, and no one came to their defense. Then they remade my favourite movies, and since they'd been getting away with this shit for years, no one dared question them.

Post by **GORDON** » Fri Nov 02, 2007 2:22 pm

Conan Barbarian is one of those rare films where, in my opinion, they completely nailed it. I watch it and can't think of a thing to criticize.

They may remake it, but they'll never take my collector's edition DVD away from me.

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Post by **GORDON** » Sat Mar 12, 2011 11:46 pm

<div><object width="576" height="324"><param name="movie" value="http://d.yimg.com/nl/movies/site/player ... ram><param name="flashVars" value="vid=24490513&"></param><param name="allowfullscreen" value="true"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed width="576" height="324" allowFullScreen="true" src="http://d.yimg.com/nl/movies/site/player.swf" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" flashvars="vid=24490513&"></embed></object></div>

Is that the dude from Stargate: Atlantis?

Post by **TPRJones** » Tue Mar 15, 2011 5:22 pm

Post by **GORDON** » Wed Jun 15, 2011 3:31 pm

Hey look at this new trailer. NuMetal, explosions, and wagons flipping end over end.

Sigh.

<object style="height: 390px; width: 640px"><param name="movie" value=" name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"><embed src="" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="640" height="390"></object>

Malcolm · Post by **Malcolm** » Wed Jun 15, 2011 11:32 pm

Maybe they're trying to tap the same dumb-ass audience that bought the MMOG.

Post by **GORDON** » Fri Aug 19, 2011 5:59 pm

CNN is slamming the movie, but honestly most of the reasons they give for it being bad sound pretty awesome.

Most.

http://www.cnn.com/2011....=hp_bn5

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Post by **GORDON** » Mon Aug 22, 2011 8:03 pm

"This is the worst movie I have ever seen in a theater."

Not me, someone else.

Post by **Leisher** » Mon Aug 22, 2011 11:19 pm

I haven't heard good things either. I know the box office for the first weekend was well below expectations.

Rotten Tomatoes has it at 24%. Ouch.

Post by **GORDON** » Sun Oct 06, 2013 10:38 pm

It was meh.

There were a couple moments where Conan was a badass, but all in all it was just another hack and slash movie. Didn't need to be a "Conan" movie at all, actually. Just "generic badass spends a lifetime to avenge the murder of his father..." sorta like Inigo in The Princess Bride.

But, lots of boobies, too, so.