Darling
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2016 10:39 pm
Synopsis:
It's the new worst movie you've ever seen Sean Young in.
Review:
"A homage to early Polanski..."
That should tell you everything you need to know about this movie. Let me run down the list:
1) black-and-white
2) two actors, at most, on the screen at any one time ... maybe three if you want to go crazy
3) lots of slow and long shots that take minutes to pan into or out of a scene
4) extremely lengthy periods of nothing punctuated by five seconds of something happening, then another twenty minutes of acid-tripping WTF shots
5) no budget
It's like The Shining except done as damn near a solo piece. Old rich bitch (Sean Young ... probably typecast) hires a twenty-something-year old girl to watch her old, creepy-ass house where the last twenty-something-year old girl threw herself off the balcony and died. I guess hiring a couple guys to patrol the outside while she's away isn't good enough because ... fuck it, something. There's also this one door at the end of the hallway that's locked and specifically forbidden by Old Mrs. Finkle. Naturally, on her first night in the house, the young caretaker finds a necklace with an upside-down cross on it and starts getting obsessed about it and some random guy that seems to keep showing up in places where she walks by.
Verdict:
Less scary than sharing champagne with Roman Polanski.
It's the new worst movie you've ever seen Sean Young in.
Review:
"A homage to early Polanski..."
That should tell you everything you need to know about this movie. Let me run down the list:
1) black-and-white
2) two actors, at most, on the screen at any one time ... maybe three if you want to go crazy
3) lots of slow and long shots that take minutes to pan into or out of a scene
4) extremely lengthy periods of nothing punctuated by five seconds of something happening, then another twenty minutes of acid-tripping WTF shots
5) no budget
It's like The Shining except done as damn near a solo piece. Old rich bitch (Sean Young ... probably typecast) hires a twenty-something-year old girl to watch her old, creepy-ass house where the last twenty-something-year old girl threw herself off the balcony and died. I guess hiring a couple guys to patrol the outside while she's away isn't good enough because ... fuck it, something. There's also this one door at the end of the hallway that's locked and specifically forbidden by Old Mrs. Finkle. Naturally, on her first night in the house, the young caretaker finds a necklace with an upside-down cross on it and starts getting obsessed about it and some random guy that seems to keep showing up in places where she walks by.
Verdict:
Less scary than sharing champagne with Roman Polanski.