Argylle (2024)

As long as we recognize Lucas is washed up and most TV sucks, we'll all get along fine.
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Leisher
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Argylle (2024)

Post by Leisher »

This is a Matthew Vaughn movie, the guy behind Kingsman, but he did not write this one. Still, you'll see some familiar visuals and cameos from two of the people in the Kingsman movie.

This movie had promise. Henry Cavill, Sam Rockwell, Bryce Dallas Howard, Bryan Cranston, Catherine O'Hara, John Cena, and [redacted in case you want the surprise]. It's an all star cast in a spy movie. It's can't miss, right?

Wrong.

It starts off strong and could have been an enjoyable romp. Unfortunately, it suffers from a pretty common mistake. The writers overdo it. Same as a painter who adds too much and ends up ruining the painting, or the chef who adds too many ingredient. There's just twist after twist after twist after twist and some of them are just shit. None are shocking and you'll see them coming a mile away. Plus, taken as a whole they just don't work together.

Additionally, while the movie starts off with one visual style that is pleasing and the action is realistic, by the end it's painfully cringe to watch. It's just so bad and there's one fight scene at the end that just makes zero sense tactically.

I just kept looking at Sam Rockwell thinking, "Really? You read this script and accepted?"

The CGI is pretty shit throughout too.

Also, Bryce is a beautiful woman, but damn she put on the pounds after childbirth. And save me your "that's what a real woman looks like". I'm not bashing her, but going from the thin girl in Jurassic World to this was pretty jarring for me as a viewer. Thus, I'm mentioning it.

There's a mid credit scene setting up a prequel that will probably never happen. This movie was a flop. It made less than $100M worldwide. Rightfully so.

I love everyone in this movie and Vaughn is an amazing director, but this was not it.
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”
GORDON
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Argyle (2023 or something)

Post by GORDON »

Hey, what if Romancing the Stone, except with Sam Rockwell playing himself every dancing character he's ever played?

But then M. Night Shyalaman?

But then what if True Lies?

And what if women had better upper body strength than men (granted, the redhead whose name I'm forgetting is kinda thick, so maybe? Not a waif. So props for that).

But then another M. Night Shyalaman?

But then what if heavy The Kingsmen?

But then what if cheeky, snarky ecological disaster, and triple-thick prequel setup?

This movie was way too long.... I got so bored with the next sterile, deadly 50v1 fight scene that I started stopping the movie before the next one started, which is why it took me 3 sittings to get through it. I feel like there's a great movie in here, but I can't think of how I'd fix it.

"Be bold, and mighty forces will come to your aid."
Leisher
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Argylle

Post by Leisher »

Merged because Gordon can't spell. :D
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”
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Argyle (2023 or something)

Post by GORDON »

Google showed my spelling, looking again it is showing two different spellings.
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Leisher
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Argylle (2024)

Post by Leisher »

Or you could look at the still from the trailer you link in your post?
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”
GORDON
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Argylle (2024)

Post by GORDON »

Or you could....
"Be bold, and mighty forces will come to your aid."
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