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Who beats me this week in the pussy league? Is it Tony Brown? Nope. Eli? Nope? Gronk? Of course not. Spencer Ware and goddamned Blount. Are you shitting me? After my patchwork team scraped together over 100 points by virtue of fantasy football Jesus with both Tyrell Williams and Mike Wallace pulling their weight. Fucking 13.7 points from Ryan Mathews, Hurns, and Chuck Clay. If only every other fucking player on my bench weren't injured, on bye, or at a shutdown defense, I could win easily.

Wow. Catt league is salvageable if Demaryius doesn't go off, David Johnson does a little bit more, and Denver's D stonewalls Lamar. That's actually a lot now that I look at it altogether.

Seattle just guaranteed OT after two straight holding penalties. Should've had a FG.

How the fuck do you miss a 24-yarder?

I'm 100% certain I've never seen a game end like that.

Steelers didn't look as bad as I thought they would.

I'm up 29 and my opponent has Demaryius Thomas tonight. Barring some miracle game, I should win.

I'm getting killed.

Leisher wrote:I'm 100% certain I've never seen a game end like that.

Looks like I should've watched the end. They missed a FG at the other end? Christ.

Looks like the O-line got decimated called out. I couldn't help notice the old dude (Jake Long) who hadn't played in a bit was being put in instead of, you know, literally any other player. Bradford is not a mobile QB, nor is his pocket awareness anything special. The running game is now down to Matt Asiata, which is another way of saying "rush the fuck out of the QB." Why? He blocks worse than one of these:


Speculation on a winless Browns team.

Broken jaw to torn ACL, Geno's not likely to wear the green and white next season. But don't tell that shit to Joe Namath.

Another thought -- how bad does Goff have to be? Case Keenum:

26th in completion %
12th in passing yards
23rd in average pass length in yards
23rd in average pass yards per game
in a 7-way tie for 14th in passing TDs
2nd most INTs (1 behind Fitzy)
34th in QB rating (a full 10 spots behind the likes of Ryan Tannehill)

You're a Gurley injury away from being tied with Frisco for shittiest team in the NFC. Is he worse than Case?

Another thought -- how bad does Goff have to be? Case Keenum:

26th in completion %
12th in passing yards
23rd in average pass length in yards
23rd in average pass yards per game
in a 7-way tie for 14th in passing TDs
2nd most INTs (1 behind Fitzy)
34th in QB rating (a full 10 spots behind the likes of Ryan Tannehill)

You're a Gurley injury away from being tied with Frisco for shittiest team in the NFC. Is he worse than Case?

The company line will be: "We're not going to the playoffs, so we feel the best thing is for him to sit and learn this year."

If the football gods have a sense of irony, LA goes 7-9 this year.

Arian Foster retires.

Brock totally looks worth his obscene contract.

Brock proved that John Elway is a pretty good GM.

I keep hearing Romo to the Jets, but honestly I don't know why Denver wouldn't go after him.

The Jets are always looking for a new train wreck, regardless of age.

Why Goodell is a complete fucktard who shouldn't be drawing a salary. Details how he gave free passes to Ray Rice, Josh Brown, and Greg Hardy.

Jeff Fisher is denying reality to a level normally only broached by Kanye West.

"The quarterback is not the reason, by the way, that we lost three games. I'm staying with Case (Keenum)," Fisher said before he was even asked Sunday afternoon at Twickenham Stadium, anticipating the long two weeks ahead.

I guess those four picks in London were someone else's fault.

"Take a look at the tape. See who's responsible for the interceptions. ... I'll make changes at receiver before I make a change at the quarterback position," Fisher said.

Wow. Must've been your receivers responsible for over, what, 50 shitty passing plays, too?

The Rams gave up two first-round picks, two second-round picks and two third-round picks for Goff because they believed he could snap Fisher's seven-quarterback losing streak, but they don't believe in him enough yet to start him over Keenum, who has eight passing touchdowns and 10 interceptions on the season.

"Jared is going to play when we feel Jared is ready," Fisher said.

By the time your Jared's ready, the other Jared might have gotten out of jail. Shit, your Jared's a worse bust; Subway got a few decent years out of Fogle.

Let me describe the story to you here because the article has a picture that's NSFW.

A Washington Redskins coach had to take a piss during the game on Sunday and instead of heading to the locker room, he grabbed a cup and turned away from the field...So a fan, who he was now facing, snapped a pic.

NSFW LINK!

You're supposed to KNEEL and piss in the cup. Ugh.

Gus Bradley might be the first to go...

Dear football gods,

Please let this owner throw the bank at Mike Tomlin so he leaves Pittsburgh.

Thanks!

There's like 10 ways to do that without flashing the crowd your dick. WTF dude.