Fast and Furious Franchise

As long as we recognize Lucas is washed up and most TV sucks, we'll all get along fine.
Leisher
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Post by Leisher »

ASSUME SPOILERS!!!! So if you haven't seen these films yet and want to, leave or blame yourself.

I'm running through them all because why not. I started while in South Carolina and continued doing it while writing some papers.

The first one was ok. I don't wish to speak ill of the dead, but Paul Walker can't act. Something many of you have pointed out elsewhere. By all accounts was a super nice guy, but he's crazy wooden.

The second one was shittier. They added mentally unbalanced Tyrese Gibson and dropped everyone but Paul Walker and the one cop.

The third is terrible. Tokyo Drift. They replaced EVERYONE. They got another wooden actor to take the lead. Suckfest.
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Post by TheCatt »

The 3rd one was nearly direct to video, let me know what you think from 4 on...
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Leisher
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Post by Leisher »

I plan to get through them as quickly as possible so all the characters are fresh in my mind.
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”
Leisher
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Post by Leisher »

Fast & Furious - I like the call back to 3 with Han. I loved that he was still eating. Character touches like that are appreciated.

The story has holes everywhere, but it's still a fun popcorn film.

Despite all the plot holes and weak villain this is probably my second favorite and I like where they're going. Characterization is everything to me. For example: I don't watch Star Trek just because it's a Sci-Fi movie, I'm watching to see what Kirk and Spock are up to and how their friendship will get them through it.

Oh! Gal Gadot is here, and is a minor plot point. She's gorgeous, but not WW in JL gorgeous. Maybe it's because she's paired up with another actor whose sexuality is suspect?
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”
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Post by Leisher »

Fast Five.

I don't get the timeline at all. How is Han still here? I guess 3 being a stand alone means they can say it happens whenever.

The Rock was a bit stiff. He didn't seem comfortable playing Hobbs.

The climatic chase scene was ridiculous. The physics just...no. Easily one of the dumbest things in movie history.

Still, I was entertained. It wasn't great though. So far I'd rank them 1, 4, 5, 2, 3.
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”
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Post by TheCatt »

Yes, the timeline is not chronological, although it generally is.

1The Fast and the Furious June 22, 2001
22 Fast 2 Furious June 6, 2003
3Fast & Furious April 3, 2009
4Fast Five April 29, 2011
5Fast & Furious 6 May 24, 2013
6The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift June 16, 2006
7Furious 7 April 3, 2015
8The Fate of the Furious April 14, 2017
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TheCatt
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Post by TheCatt »

Leisher wrote: The climatic chase scene was ridiculous. The physics just...no. Easily one of the dumbest things in movie history.
Welcome to the rest of the series.
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Leisher
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Post by Leisher »

TheCatt wrote: Welcome to the rest of the series.
Fast and Furious 6.

The fucking plane scene makes The Transformers look like a documentary. Easily the most unrealistic scene in movie history.

Why did ______ die? They were 20 feet off the fucking ground!

Bonus points for the ridiculousness of the character "twist". It made zero sense, was never set up or hinted at, and contradicted previous events and actions.

1, 4, 5, 2, 6, 3
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Post by TheCatt »

Leisher wrote: Why did ______ die? They were 20 feet off the fucking ground!
Cuz they were going super fast? I dunno, I really cannot recall who you are talking about.
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Post by Leisher »

Gal Gadot.

I know why she died as she was heading to WB to film WW, BvS, and JL, but her death was stupid. She could have survived that fall.
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”
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Post by TheCatt »

Leisher wrote: Gal Gadot.

I know why she died as she was heading to WB to film WW, BvS, and JL, but her death was stupid. She could have survived that fall.
She could survive the fall, she was on the back of an SUV. But they were ostensibly going like 100+mph.
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Post by Leisher »

TheCatt wrote:
Leisher wrote: Gal Gadot.

I know why she died as she was heading to WB to film WW, BvS, and JL, but her death was stupid. She could have survived that fall.
She could survive the fall, she was on the back of an SUV. But they were ostensibly going like 100+mph.
In a world where a street car can haul a 30 ton vault crashing through buildings and not on wheels and a runway is approximately 100 miles long, I'm going to say she could survive.
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”
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Post by Leisher »

Seven maintains the ridiculous stunts and flimsy plots. This time they added Jason Statham, which is cool. I'd probably change my list to 1, 4, 5, 7, 2, 6, 3.

I've been wondering when Paul Walker died in real life in relation to the films. Turns out, it was #7. I noticed almost immediately his role had been reduced just a bit and there were more shots of him from a distance, sides, and behind. (This was done so they could use stand ins.) Still a shame he died the way he did.
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”
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Post by Leisher »

Fast 8 was more of the same. The stunts weren't as ridiculous this time so much as unbelievable.

The new Paul Walker sucked. No charisma at all.

8 movies and they finally put one on two wheels.

The Statham scene with the baby is the highlight of the entire series.
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”
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Post by Leisher »

If you were wondering about the Rock/Vin Diesel feud...
All of which may help explain the drama that boiled over on the set of The Fate of the Furious in 2016. During the last week of filming, Johnson posted a message on his Instagram slamming anonymous co-stars who fail to "conduct themselves as stand-up men and true professionals" and were "too chickenshit to do anything about it. . . . Candyasses."

It soon became clear Johnson was referring to co-star Vin Diesel. When the film came out, eagle-eyed viewers noticed the pair's scenes were shot in such a way that they might not have been on set at the same time. "That is correct," confirms Johnson. "We were not in any scenes together."

"Dwayne will give you a lot of latitude," Beau Flynn says. "You can push and push and push. But there's a line in the sand with him – close to his toes, probably – and if you cross that, that's one of the rare times he gets upset."

Johnson says their beef came down to a disagreement about professionalism. "Vin and I had a few discussions, including an important face-to-face in my trailer," he says. "And what I came to realize is that we have a fundamental difference in philosophies on how we approach moviemaking and collaborating. It took me some time, but I'm grateful for that clarity. Whether we work together again or not."

Does that mean he might not be back for the ninth installment? "I'm not quite sure," he says. "Right now I'm concentrating on making the spinoff as good as it can be" – Hobbs and Shaw, co-starring Jason Statham, due next year. "But I wish him all the best, and I harbor no ill will there, just because of the clarity we have." He considers this, then lets out a big, sly laugh. "Actually, you can erase that last part about 'no ill will.' We'll just keep it with the clarity."
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”
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Post by Leisher »

https://youtu.be/afzo29_Vni4

Now with more John Cena.

Also, if you don't think the series can get any stupider, check out the final car stunt in the trailer.
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Post by TheCatt »

I don't care how stupid it is, I'm watching it.
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Post by GORDON »

I stopped sleeping with a woman once when she told me those were her favorite movies.
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Leisher
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Post by Leisher »

GORDON wrote: I stopped sleeping with a woman once when she told me those were her favorite movies.
I respect that.
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”
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Post by Leisher »

Do they hire children to write the dialogue for these movies? Absolutely awful. On the bright side, it perfectly matches the acting performances.

F9: The Fast Saga is honestly pretty terrible.

The stunts, physics, and science are off the charts stupid.

Also, you apparently have to die in real life to actually die in these movies.
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”
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