Yay Netflix!
This movie evoked memories of the Uruguay rugby team that crashed in the Andes along with Lost and Lord of the Flies. In fact, one review calls it a "beat by beat retelling" of the later.
The USMNT plays Brazil (and wins...so it's already bullshit) and crashes on the way back home. The survivors find shelter on a deserted island in what is assumed to be the South Pacific. Where were they playing Brazil??? Anyway, the biggest actor in the movie, James Remar, doesn't survive the flight. That leaves a bunch of young men on the island with two attractive girls. Yes, sex happens, but no nudity. Also, far less rape or disputing over the women than you would imagine.
They're only there for days, not weeks or months, and yet shit goes down hill fast. Not enough to resort to cannibalism despite the fact they're all starving, but enough to make them drop their morals or some shit. I mean, they're not there three days and one guy already commits suicide. WTF? They also break up into two groups and live on separate islands a mile apart. So two groups of people, dehydrated and starving, swim back and forth a mile each way. This is a group of people who somehow can start a fire and know that the berries are poisonous, but don't know how to fish, build a proper shelter, or even consider using the large amount of food their dead offer.
The ending will make you laugh out loud. It's "hall of shame" awful. The last line of dialogue makes me wonder if this wasn't a poorly written comedy.
The story, acting, dialogue, etc. are all laughably bad. In fact, I was, literally, laughing during the movie while saying, "This movie is so bad."
Eden (2015)
Eden (2015)
“Every record been destroyed or falsified, books rewritten, pictures repainted, statues, street building renamed, every date altered. The process is continuing day by day. History stops. Nothing exists except endless present in which the Party is right.”