Death Sentence

As long as we recognize Lucas is washed up and most TV sucks, we'll all get along fine.
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Malcolm
Posts: 32040
Joined: Fri May 21, 2004 1:04 pm
Location: Minneapolis

Post by Malcolm »

Synopsis:
Someone decided to take a shit on the Death Wish franchise, but Charles Bronson was dead and Kevin Bacon was brought in.

Review:
Stay with me here. Brian Garfield is the dude who wrote the novels "Death Wish" and "Death Sentence." You all know Death Wish and its many identical sequels. "Death Sentence" is the 1970s literature sequel to "Death Wish." They finally made a standalone flick in 2007 with that title, but it has little to nothing to do with the book.

Anyhow, <s>Charles Bronson</s> Kevin Bacon's <s>daughter</s> son gets killed by a gang member under some of the most contrived circumstances known to mankind in the 21st century. He retaliates which leads to the gang terrorizing his entire family ... which leads to more retaliation.

This starts out as a passably believable plot, much the same way Death Wish did. Somewhere during the Act I-II transition, shit gets insane in 0.02 seconds flat. It's obvious this is supposed to be modern America, but some of the logic is straight from the '70s and is simply laughable in post-9/11 time. By the time Act III rolls around, Kevin Bacon has gone from suburban executive to one-man army, complete with a sequence in compliance with the Montage Ordinance of 1981. This is a second-rate action movie masquerading as a drama. Fortunately, even the writers and director got tired of pushing that lie and just started breaking out bullets towards the end.

Verdict:
If you ever wondered what Death Wish would've been like without Chuck, then this is your movie.
Diogenes of Sinope: "It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."
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