Synopsis:
A group of anti-Indiana Joneses get lost in an old-ass pyramid because they decided to listen to the least experienced woman in the lot.
Review:
Formulaic, predictable, boring, cliche.
Some archaeologists unearth a three-sided pyramid in Egypt, meaning it's either thousands of years older than accepted Egyptian civilization or someone intentionally buried the fucker. With the land of the pharaohs being the politically stable bulwark that it is, a local rebellion forces everyone to bug the fuck out ... until the expedition lead listens to his dumb-ass blonde bimbo daughter and sends in the rover on loan from NASA for "a couple hours."
Turns out the pyramid is somehow a magical ecosystem unto to itself (which they badly explain an hour in). I'll leave it there, but suffice it to say the rover gets lost and they dive in to get the "expendable" bot. Hilarity ensues.
A word to future horror filmmakers: stop using the fucking gimmick where the cameraman is a cast member. Fuck your found footage angle and fuck you. It's become such a pandemic, I think we need a new parody film series. There's Scary Movie, but what's called for here is Shitty Found Footage Movie with Bad CG. Word is that this 90-minute POS grossed 10% of what it was supposed to domestically. Probably not a good idea to hire one of the screenwriters from Haute Tension to helm things. Other .. hahah ... highlights of his resume: The Hills Have Eyes (remake), Mirrors, Pirahna 3-D, and Maniac with Elijah Wood. If you don't recognize any of those, don't worry, they're all remakes of someone else's work and you most likely know the originals. P2 is an example of the godawful tripe Grégory Levasseur revels in producing so he can steal your money.
Verdict:
Most cinematic mistakes like this at least give you some nudity as a consolation prize.