Today's Moron Champion

Stuff we should click on.  Be sure to state Not Work Safe, if applicable.  KTHX.
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Leisher
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Postby Leisher » Sun Sep 27, 2015 4:29 pm

Tries to kill a spider with a lighter...

...while filling his car with gas.
“Nothing quite brings out the zest for life in a person like the thought of their impending death”
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Malcolm
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Postby Malcolm » Sun Sep 27, 2015 8:56 pm

Ah, Detroit.
Diogenes of Sinope: "It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."

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Leisher
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Postby Leisher » Mon Sep 28, 2015 2:06 pm

“Nothing quite brings out the zest for life in a person like the thought of their impending death”
― Jhonen Vasquez, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac: Director's Cut

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Leisher
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Postby Leisher » Tue Dec 08, 2015 9:03 am

“Nothing quite brings out the zest for life in a person like the thought of their impending death”
― Jhonen Vasquez, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac: Director's Cut

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Malcolm
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Postby Malcolm » Tue Dec 08, 2015 10:43 am


Wtf did the gator do to deserve death?
Diogenes of Sinope: "It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."

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TheCatt
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Postby TheCatt » Tue Dec 08, 2015 10:46 am

Malcolm wrote:

Wtf did the gator do to deserve death?

Pretty sure that's standard operating procedure of any animal that kills a human.

Less sure if they then cut off its head and put it on a stake as a message to others.
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Malcolm
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Postby Malcolm » Tue Dec 08, 2015 10:57 am

TheCatt wrote:
Malcolm wrote:

Wtf did the gator do to deserve death?

Pretty sure that's standard operating procedure of any animal that kills a human.

Less sure if they then cut off its head and put it on a stake as a message to others.

From the gator's point of view, it was defending its home turf. Does the "Stand Your Ground" rule not apply to water?
Diogenes of Sinope: "It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."

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TheCatt
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Postby TheCatt » Tue Dec 08, 2015 12:11 pm

It doesn't apply to animals.
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Malcolm
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Postby Malcolm » Tue Dec 08, 2015 12:17 pm

TheCatt wrote:It doesn't apply to animals.

Species-ist. All flippancy aside, I'd let the gator go.
Diogenes of Sinope: "It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."

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Leisher
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Postby Leisher » Wed Jan 27, 2016 12:38 pm

The duct tape challenge

Kids are dumb. These "challenges" are big on YouTube and kids eat the shit up. I know the Cinnamon challenge was a thing and was dangerous. The Ice Bucket Challenge was for charity and only claimed one life (seriously).
“Nothing quite brings out the zest for life in a person like the thought of their impending death”
― Jhonen Vasquez, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac: Director's Cut

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Leisher
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Postby Leisher » Wed Jan 27, 2016 12:40 pm

“Nothing quite brings out the zest for life in a person like the thought of their impending death”
― Jhonen Vasquez, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac: Director's Cut

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Leisher
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Postby Leisher » Mon Mar 21, 2016 2:22 pm

“Nothing quite brings out the zest for life in a person like the thought of their impending death”
― Jhonen Vasquez, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac: Director's Cut

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Malcolm
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Postby Malcolm » Mon Mar 21, 2016 2:44 pm


West Virginia State Police say a 15-year-old boy was killed while playing a game of "dodging arrows."

We used air pellet, BB, and paintball guns. Is that not enough for the youth of today?
Diogenes of Sinope: "It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."

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Leisher
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Postby Leisher » Mon Mar 28, 2016 11:56 am

“Nothing quite brings out the zest for life in a person like the thought of their impending death”
― Jhonen Vasquez, Johnny the Homicidal Maniac: Director's Cut

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Malcolm
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Postby Malcolm » Mon Mar 28, 2016 1:16 pm


Tannerite — a mixture of ammonium nitrate and aluminum powder that explodes when struck by a high-velocity bullet — is normally used for target practice.

Dumb-ass. If you want a stable explosive, C4. If you want to detonate something, blasting cap.
Diogenes of Sinope: "It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."

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Malcolm
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Re: Today's Moron Champion

Postby Malcolm » Wed May 25, 2016 3:08 pm

Dumb-ass leaves gun out in the open. I know it's a constitutionally protected right and all, but when do you draw a line and tell someone, "You're too fucking stupid to be trusted with this hardware?"
During this week’s court appearance, Anthony Senatore testified that he was only 10 feet away when his son fired the fatal shot.

“When the gun went off, I turned around and realized what gun it had been,” Senatore said, according to video published by the Press. “I immediately removed it from his hands and threw it into my garage up on my work bench...

So your kid is a few yards away and you fail to notice him toting around the loaded weapon you accidentally left lying around?
Senatore’s attorney, Robert Ebberup, told the paper last year that his client — a sportsman who hunts and fishes — had originally removed the rifle from a gun locker after hearing a noise in the middle of the night. Senatore testified that the weapon was wrapped in a towel and loaded at the time, according to the Press.

The gun was under the bed for months.

Fucking brilliant.
“Each and every one of us have hobbies and other recreational activities that we pursue,” he said. “I am no different than any other person in that respect, but for one horrible mistake, one terrible lapse in judgment, which will define the remainder of my days.”

Whoa, hold up there, hoss. ONE?
During a court appearance in 2014, Atlantic County Prosecutor Jim McClain said Senatore also kept multiple shotguns in the house, including a Remington 12-gauge and two Harrington & Richardsons. The weapons were placed near ammunition, the prosecutor said, in a household with three children aged 12, 8 and 4.

Fucking moron. I secure my caffeine powder better than you do your weapons.
Diogenes of Sinope: "It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."

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Malcolm
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Re: Today's Moron Champion

Postby Malcolm » Fri May 27, 2016 1:16 pm

Idiot retired nurse dies in the woods. Body not found for two years.
But on June 30, while in New Hampshire, Lee was forced by a family emergency to leave the trail. Largay insisted on going on alone despite what Lee said was a poor sense of direction.

Lee later told investigators that Largay "had taken a wrong turn on the trail, more than once." She also said Largay was afraid to be alone — and scared of the dark, the New York Times reported.

Largay's doctor told them she was prone to panic attacks and took anxiety medication.

Seriously? The fuck?

Investigators said Largay's cellphone revealed she got lost in the dense woods after she left the trail to use the bathroom. Right away, she texted her husband for help.
...
It turned out that Largay, who died while waiting for help that never arrived, was just two miles from the Appalachian Trail.

She had a compass and a cell phone with at least some charge left in it.
Diogenes of Sinope: "It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."

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GORDON
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Re: Today's Moron Champion

Postby GORDON » Fri May 27, 2016 1:40 pm

I always tell my wife, "If you are lost, go north, the compass is right there on your dashboard. You'll either hit State Route 2, or you'll hit Lake Erie. Either way, turn left. You'll find your way home.

Sometimes I add, "If roadsigns start appearing in French, you went too far."
Fuuuuuuck YOU.

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Malcolm
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Re: Today's Moron Champion

Postby Malcolm » Sun May 29, 2016 9:05 pm

Zoo down a gorilla because people who shouldn't be allowed to breed did so.
The boy climbed through a barrier and fell some 15 feet to a shallow moat in Harambe's enclosure, Maynard said.
Kimberly Ann Perkins O'Connor, who captured some of the incident on her phone, told CNN she overheard the boy joking to his mother about going into the water.
...
"Unfortunately, it was a bad situation where a 4-year-old didn't have the attention of his mother for seconds," she said. "I don't think it was as easy as standing up and falling in. He actually had to climb under something, through some bushes and then into the moat."

Dumb-ass.
Some even suggested the boy's parents should be held criminally responsible for the incident.

I'd say that's entirely justifiable, along with a lifetime ban from the zoo.
Diogenes of Sinope: "It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours."
Arnold Judas Rimmer, BSC, SSC: "Better dead than smeg."

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TheCatt
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Re: Today's Moron Champion

Postby TheCatt » Mon May 30, 2016 8:49 am

That's insane, Malcolm. Kids can get away. If it only took a few or several seconds, maybe the zoo should be better designed.
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