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Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2014 8:50 am
by GORDON
He's at Disney? He only mentioned Universal.

Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2014 12:01 pm
by GORDON
Today I decided fuckit: I could walk all day again where every step is agony, or I can drop seventy bones on a motorized scooter. Today I join the hordes of fatties too lazy to walk.

And it is glorious. The park looks different when not seen through a haze of pain.

Posted: Fri Sep 26, 2014 12:05 pm
by GORDON
I think everyone decided they want to drive the 16 hours home without stopping for the night. Makes no difference to them since I am the one driving 90% of the time. So looks like Sunday at 2am for getting home. Who's up for some League?

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 11:47 am
by GORDON
16 hours doesn't sound like a long time to drive, but it really is.

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 12:10 pm
by Leisher
the hordes of fatties too lazy to walk.


Fatso-Transpos.

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 12:13 pm
by GORDON
GORDON wrote:Going to attempt to hit all 4 parks today... which I call "batting the cycle." I just made up that phrase.

Haven't even left the room yet and the wife and kid are already complaining.

By the way, this was a success. We hit and rode the major rides in all 4 parks, hitting the last at 4pm in time to make out 7pm dinner reservation.

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 1:05 pm
by thibodeaux
I'll give my recap:
Monday did Universal. We stayed at a Universal hotel so we got to get in the park an hour before official opening time. Ran (literally) to Diagon Alley to get on the Gringott's ride. Still had to wait a while in the queue. Went to Ollivander's and the kids got picked to be in the wand-choosing or whatever. Bought some candy and crap. And wands.

Rode the train over to Hogsmeade. Rode the Castle ride, that was good. Waited in line for Hippogriff (dumb). Rode the Dragon (heh) three times; the line was so short we were just cutting back through the "re-ride" shortcut. Had lunch at 3 Broomsticks.

Then we went and rode a bunch of the Marvel rides. Rode Spiderman once and The Hulk 3 times. I blacked out the 2nd time. Rode Dr. Doom (definitely very short for the wait). The we rode the Popeye water ride and the Dudley Do-right water ride. Then it poured rain for an hour, and then we rode the Jurassic Park water ride twice, because there was no line: they shut everything down when it storms. Lightning actually hit the Men-in-Black building we found out later.

Tuesday back to Universal. Rode Gringott's again. Rode the Minions, then Shrek (lame!), then rode Rockit three times. I was blasting Motley Crue. Also did Tornado (EXTREMELY lame), the Mummy, and Disaster. My kid got to star with Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson in Disaster. We went through Poseidon's Fury, and my kid got chosen to be the "assisstant."

Then we did MiB and ET (lame!). Had lunch at Cauldron: bangers and mash. I liked it, so maybe Gordon is just Scottish. Rode the train back to Hogsmeade and rode the Castle. Kids rode the kiddie Flyer ride in Jurassic Park (lame). Then we rode the Dragon twice.

Wednesday we went to Magic Kingdom. Got in when they opened and ran to the new 7 Dwarfs ride. Then Splash Mt, then Big Thunder Mt. (twice). Did Pirates, Jungle Cruise, Haunted Mansion, Hall of Presidents, Peter Pan, Small World, Tom Sawyer Island (kids loved the caves). Then Country Bears, Swiss Family Robinson, Teacups, Little Mermaid. Rode the train around the park, then did Monster Inc Laugh Factory (enjoyable!), Space Mountain twice, Buzz Lightyear, Big Thunder Mt (again). Finally we watched the Electric Parade, which I found weird and lame. We slid out during the fireworks. Also, we had lunch at some Space Cafe; I had ribs where weren't bad.

Also, we drove, which was about 9.5 hours, interstate all the way, down on Sunday, back on Thursday.

Ok summary: Universal > Disney. Disney is jammed with fatsos on scooters, and families with strollers. Also the rides are LAME! The most extreme coaster is Space Mountain, and it's only exciting because it's pitch black. Everthing else you're just kind of putting along a track looking at robot animals or some goofy shit that was cool in 1968 or whatever. So fuck Disney.

Universal, we rode the shit out of their coasters. My kids (10 and 8) ranked them as follows:
1. Rockit
2. Hulk
3. Dragon

I tend to agree. Although the Hulk and Rockit beat the shit out of me. I will most likely never ever fly a fighter jet, but I betcha the Rockit is close to what that feels like.

The rest of most of the rides, like the Harry Potter rides, Spiderman, and Transformers, were OK but I prefer the coasters. These rides are technologically interesting. They have 3-D video, and the cars are on the end of what are basically giant industrial robot manipulators, so they can do some interesting things. They are very immersive, but I still prefer the coasters.




Edited By thibodeaux on 1411924198

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 1:22 pm
by Malcolm
I will most likely never ever fly a fighter jet, but I betcha the Rockit is close to what that feels like.

Back at Six Flags over Mid-America, there was this coaster called the Ninja. When it was introduced, it worked like a well-oiled machine. After a few years of neglect, it got jittery and brutal.

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 2:51 pm
by GORDON
thibodeaux wrote:My kid got to star with Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson in Disaster.

Yes, so did mine! I got to be the Agent.

It was after the fact when I saw the joke... when they filmed, they tell the kid to look up at a boulder dangling from ropes from the ceiling, in order to get the correct eye-line. They say, "Look up at the rock!"

Then after post production, the kid is looking up at The Rock.

Wish we could have gotten the vid on a thumb drive or something.... because the gardening granny was also hilarious.




Edited By GORDON on 1411931013

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 2:55 pm
by GORDON
thibodeaux wrote:Ok summary: Universal > Disney. Disney is jammed with fatsos on scooters, and families with strollers. Also the rides are LAME! The most extreme coaster is Space Mountain, and it's only exciting because it's pitch black. Everthing else you're just kind of putting along a track looking at robot animals or some goofy shit that was cool in 1968 or whatever. So fuck Disney.

Disnery is more than just the Magic Kingdom, where you went. That place was designed for kids.

Disney Hollywood Studios has an Aerosmith coaster which is good, and an excellent Twilight Zone ride.

Animal Kingdom (which I call Animal Sucktown because I don't like zoos) has a massive Mt. Everest Coaster, a water ride, and a Dinosaur ride that is jerky as hell.

Epcot has the big ball which is nice just to sit in AC for 10 minutes, but they also have Test Track where your kid gets to design a car then ride in it and compete against the other assholes in your car, it has a Mission to Mars ride that had me ready to puke, and... that might be it for the thrill ride stuff.

You guys went to the lamest park. SHould have hit all 4 in one day like the one family did once.

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 3:02 pm
by GORDON
Oh, and the I-75 pig report:

About 150 miles of I-75 in Florida north of Orlando, about 15% of the entire trip, and we counted 22 cops.... on the way down. 17 on the way north. We saw an equivalent number in Georgia, Tennessee, Kentucky, and Ohio.... combined. They really care about safety in Florida.




Edited By GORDON on 1411931133

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 3:04 pm
by GORDON
Also, I can't ride the Monorail any more without wondering if that was the seat TPR got laid on. *shiver*

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 3:23 pm
by TheCatt
GORDON wrote:Also, I can't ride the Monorail any more without wondering if that was the seat TPR got laid on. *shiver*

wut wut?

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 3:54 pm
by GORDON
Complaint about Disney Hollywood Studios:

Everything is Frozen.

The main street is decorated in a Frozen motif. They make it snow now and then. A popular ride is being shut down and turned into a Frozen ride. In the park there is a thing to turn your little girl into a Frozen princess. The line to met the Frozen princesses is always 100+ minutes, all day long. The dumb Olaf snowman is everywhere. My wife said there was something else there geared toward girls. There is nothing neat for little boys. An employee there said the Frozen stuff was supposed to be gone already but it was so darned popular they kept it....

It would be a shame if they had done the park up in Guardians of the Galaxy, most popular movie of the year, to match the 50 foot billboard they had on a studio wall.

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 8:47 pm
by Vince
GORDON wrote:It would be a shame if they had done the park up in Guardians of the Galaxy, most popular movie of the year, to match the 50 foot billboard they had on a studio wall.

Marvel is for boys. Disney is for girls. Thought you knew that.

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 9:28 pm
by Leisher
Universal > Disney


Is Universal even a theme park? I thought they were a thrill park like Cedar Point? Also, Universal can't carry Cedar Point's jock in terms of thrills. (Rated #1 in the world.)

However, as a theme park Disney > everybody else. They're more about a family experience and vacation, not just about thrills.

You probably wouldn't want a motorcycle for your daily commute, but if you want to feel the wind in your hair it wins over your Honda Accord.

Disnery is more than just the Magic Kingdom, where you went.


You only went there? Yeah, you missed all the "adult" and new stuff. As Gordo said, the Magic Kingdom is for kids, mainly girls, and features all the nostalgic stuff. Although, did you ride the new roller coaster with the Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs theme?

Epcot has the big ball which is nice just to sit in AC for 10 minutes, but they also have Test Track where your kid gets to design a car then ride in it and compete against the other assholes in your car, it has a Mission to Mars ride that had me ready to puke, and... that might be it for the thrill ride stuff.


You forgot Soarin' and beer from around the world. Not to mention 2 five star restaurants.

Animal Kingdom (which I call Animal Sucktown because I don't like zoos) has a massive Mt. Everest Coaster, a water ride, and a Dinosaur ride that is jerky as hell.


Which Dino ride? The coaster or the themed one with the great scare towards the end?

Disney Hollywood Studios has an Aerosmith coaster which is good, and an excellent Twilight Zone ride.


Both are awesome.

Marvel is for boys. Disney is for girls. Thought you knew that.


That perception is why they bought Marvel and Star Wars.

Give them time. When I was there three years ago there was talk of a fifth park (Downtown and Boardwalk Disney don't count). Nobody knew what it was based on, but the word was thrills. Personally, I think it's a no brainer that they create a park geared towards boys.

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 9:45 pm
by Vince
Leisher wrote:
Marvel is for boys. Disney is for girls. Thought you knew that.


That perception is why they bought Marvel and Star Wars.

Give them time. When I was there three years ago there was talk of a fifth park (Downtown and Boardwalk Disney don't count). Nobody knew what it was based on, but the word was thrills. Personally, I think it's a no brainer that they create a park geared towards boys.

I don't think it's just the perception. Disney is kind of odd how they deal with their brand. I remember when The Black Hole came out and the Disney execs were all worried about how it would look as that movie had somewhat more adult themes and was darker than most Disney flicks. So they made Touchstone and then eventually bought Mirimax so as not to "taint" the Disney name with those things.

So even with the shit tons of money that Guardians of The Galaxy made, the raccoon grabbing his crotch and the lead flipping of the Nova police and all the violence of all the Marvel movies in general will keep them from ever fully embracing Marvel as a Disney product. They're the whore that keep referring to themselves "lady of the evening". They're still taking the money.

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 9:57 pm
by Leisher
I don't understand your argument at all.

That's just good marketing/business.

Disney does have a brand that evokes a perception. Why would you do something to taint it?

That being said, they can use their other brands in the way they've built themselves. Meanwhile, Disney doesn't exactly hide the fact that they own them.

I'm not seeing the problem.

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 10:45 pm
by GORDON
Oh yeah, Soarin'.... I think that is the dullest, most overrated ride based on anything, anywhere. I just don't get the appeal.

I meant the Dinosaur ride in the dark. Not as jerky as I remember, but still bounces you around in your seat.

We rode the new 7 Dwarfs coaster twice.... cute, but kinda lame. Not even as fast as the... ummm... the coaster that is the train next to the water ride. Drawing a blank. Oh, Big Thunder Mountain Railroad. It isn't even as fast as that, and that aint fast.

Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2014 11:05 pm
by Vince
Leisher wrote:I don't understand your argument at all.

That's just good marketing/business.

Disney does have a brand that evokes a perception. Why would you do something to taint it?

That being said, they can use their other brands in the way they've built themselves. Meanwhile, Disney doesn't exactly hide the fact that they own them.

I'm not seeing the problem.

It's no secret that RJ Reynolds owns Nabisco either, but you don't see a "Brought to you by the great folks that brought you Winston cigarettes" on your shredded wheat either. It's propaganda is all I'm saying.