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But the general way condominium associations seem to work—at least in our major coastal centers—is through a kind of arbitrary totalitarianism. Essentially everything is against the rules, and daily life is made tolerable only through the fact that the rules aren't actually enforced. But then anytime someone wants to be a pain in the ass, they can demand enforcement of some random provision or other. In other words, it's an ideal setup for selective harassment of your gay neighbor (or whatever) because everyone's in violation of something or other.

And the problem is that there's essentially no escape. In any condo, the rules are made by the condo board and at condo meetings. And while the boards and the meetings are theoretically democratic institutions, in practice they self-select for busybodies who feel like wasting their time on condo business. That quality of erring on the side of busybodiness is a characteristic that all associations have in common, and the transaction costs involved in selling real estate and moving are enormous. So in practice everyone winds up in an excessively busybody-dominated condo where too much stuff is against the rules and enforcement is too spotty and arbitrary. Most people simply aren't litigious enough to fight back.