Thunderdome 2015 » Printable Version of Topic

Forum: General Stuff
Topic: Irrational Bitching
started by: GORDON

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 02 2015,14:36

Old people, amirite?

Posted by Malcolm on Nov. 02 2015,15:34

(GORDON @ Nov. 02 2015,16:36)

QUOTE

~~Old~~ people, amirite?

Yep.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 02 2015,17:16

Ok here is what is pissing me off about old people:

I have a spot in the morning in the gym where I put out my mat, and I can put my feet just so against the wall and do my stretching... I need that extra support because I still have major, permanent nerve damage in my ankles, and I need to keep my feet in the proper position to get a proper stretch. And I have used this stretching spot for the last 3 months. Another guy, probably 70 years old but in decent shape, is against a different wall doing his old-timey shit like knee bends and medicine ball and big iron dumbells or whatever. I don't watch him.

But the last week there is a brand new old man there, and the fucker keeps stealing into my spot while I am hanging up my gym bag and shit. So then my spot is gone and I have to drag a fucking mat out into the hallway to get a good spot where I can do my ankle support thing. He is an old man and I hope he has a fucking stroke or something and stops taking my spot. This does not seem irrational to me at all.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 02 2015,17:19

And then there's the fucking trainer that is on duty at that time in the morning, Mr Studly McHardbody, and stubbly and rugged, and he ignores the 20 old people in the gym and spends the entire hour that I am there chatting up the most likely reproductive partner who happens to be there that morning. There's usually 1 attractive woman there at that time... but only one. And not the same one from day to day. It's weird.

But yeah, he ignores everyone else. Not that I need him for anything, but still.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 02 2015,17:20

Then a few weeks ago there was some hot woman who stole my spot right as I was heading to it. She put out her mat, put down her iPod and huge water bottle on it, then stood there for 40 minutes not doing anything, chatting up Mr. Studly McHardbody while I glared at her from out in the hall. Bitch.

Posted by thibodeaux on Nov. 02 2015,17:22

Don't know if this goes here or in the workout thread, but I guess here.

See, I have a routine, and I like to stick to it. Saturday I was at the point in my routine where I needed a certain machine. I walk over to it. There's an older man sitting there; I figure mid to late 60s. I say, "do you mind if I work in?" Well this pisses him off for some reason!

Him: "I never understood that concept! I just started! Isn't there anything else you can do?"
Me: "Well, actually, this is the last thing I want to do, so...no."
He walks off grumbling. I see him on another machine flopping around. He goes to a couple different ones while I finish my sets. I walk off to get my hoodie from the locker, and I pass him on the way out.

Me: "If you have a second I can explain 'working in.' It's basically taking turns."
Him: "You really couldn't do anything else?"
Me: "That was the last thing I wanted to do."
Him: "What? Bull! Why are you still here?"
Me: "I'm leaving right now."
He walks off grumbling.
Me (to his back): "You know, you're probably going to get asked this again. It's protocol"
Him: "I'll do something else! I don't have an ego problem!"

WTF man. I'm gonna assume he was in Korea or something and has PTSD.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 02 2015,17:22

Then one day I was done stretching and was going to start my lifting circuit, and right on position 1, the tricep extension, this 90 year old guy was sitting there with his eyes closed. I passed it by and kept my eye on it so I could go back and do it, and after 20 minutes I figured I better check for a pulse, and as I walked up to him he opened his eyes and left. Fucker. Just napping on the fucking exercise machine.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 02 2015,17:29

Then there's the old man who wears jeans and a button shirt and suspenders every morning.... something about him screams "farmer." I don't know if his doctor told him to exercise, or what... but you can tell he's just a tourist getting in the way. When he's doing a machine correctly, he's doing 10 pounds. When he isn't, he has it set for a 2-inch range of motion, doing nothing but getting in everyone's way. Fucker.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 02 2015,17:31

There is this groovy old woman, though.... she's looks 85 and walks serious power laps a lot of mornings on the track that goes around the room, wearing her earbuds. I'd love to know what she is jamming to.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 02 2015,17:32

Then on some mornings there is a group of 5-7 women in there with a female trainer, and they are doing some weird routine. The go position to position, seemingly at random, chatting to each other and not doing any serious work, just generally getting in the way. I want to tell them, "Go to Curves."

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 02 2015,17:36

(thibodeaux @ Nov. 02 2015,20:22)

QUOTE

See, I have a routine, and I like to stick to it. Saturday I was at the point in my routine where I needed a certain machine. I walk over to it. There's an older man sitting there; I figure mid to late 60s. I say, "do you mind if I work in?"

I like my routine, too.

There are signs all over the my gym telling people to allow others to work in like that. Typically I don't bother pushing the issue... I have my "backup machine" to which I will jump ahead if someone is blocking my next thing.

I also don't get up while I am at a machine, though, either... unless someone is standing RIGHT THERE obviously waiting. Then I would offer, but it has never happened. I do my 3 sets on each machine, counting to 30 in between, then I am gone. Four minutes, tops. I'm not hogging anything.

I wish people would just start at the beginning and not jump around, though. No one would ever get in anyone elses way.

Posted by TheCatt on Nov. 02 2015,18:03

(thibodeaux @ Nov. 02 2015,20:22)

QUOTE

Me (to his back): "You know, you're probably going to get asked this again. It's protocol"
Him: "I'll do something else! I don't have an ego problem!"

WTF man. I'm gonna assume he was in Korea or something and has PTSD.

Ugh. I swim a fair amount (although taking a break right now).

I was swimming solo in a lane. Well, I pretty much look straight down when swimming, and was in the middle of the lane. Some woman hopped in, started swimming and nearly hit me. I waited at the end of the lane then got her attention.

Me: So common swimming etiquette is that you hop in, and wait at the end of the lane to be acknowledged before swimming.
Her: What? I've never heard of that before.
Me: Well, it's so that people don't run into each other like you almost did today.
Her: Where is this etiquette written?
Me: I dunno, the internet?
Her: I've swum lots of places, and have never heard of this.
Me: Well, ma'am, I've been swimming 20 years, and pretty much everyone but you does it.
Her: (swims off in a huff)

(30 minutes later, I'm done, playing with my kids in the kid portion of the pool)

Her: I want you to know that I have NEVER needed to make people aware, you should swim with your head UP and be aware of your surroundings.
Me: That'd be bad swimming form.
Her: It's YOUR fault.

She was like... mid-50's I think.

Posted by TheCatt on Nov. 02 2015,18:04

(GORDON @ Nov. 02 2015,20:29)

QUOTE

Lot of Indian people in our area, and other Asians.

1) (Many) Indian people wear a lot of clothes when working out, they look horribly uncomfortable. Full pants, trying to jog, etc.
2) (Many) Asian people apparnetly don't believe in rules. Not taking turns, not waiting their turn, playing in the swim lanes.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 02 2015,18:30

(TheCatt @ Nov. 02 2015,21:03)

QUOTE

I was swimming solo in a lane. Well, I pretty much look straight down when swimming, and was in the middle of the lane. Some woman hopped in, started swimming and nearly hit me. I waited at the end of the lane then got her attention.

Me: So common swimming etiquette is that you hop in, and wait at the end of the lane to be acknowledged before swimming.

Actually, tomorrow I am going to start swimming laps in my lifting off-days. Got my goggles in my gym bag, and errything. I always wondered at the proper etiquette for sharing a lane.

So you jump in and wait at the end and make eye contact then start after the other person is out of your way?

I bet a dollar no one else does that, but I will.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 02 2015,18:31

(TheCatt @ Nov. 02 2015,21:03)

QUOTE

(30 minutes later, I'm done, playing with my kids in the kid portion of the pool)

Her: I want you to know that I have NEVER needed to make people aware, you should swim with your head UP and be aware of your surroundings.

Took her a while to think of a comeback?

Posted by Malcolm on Nov. 02 2015,19:08

Going to the gym is like driving. Awesome except for all the other assholes around. I could do an HBO comedy special on the stupid/weird shit I see and hear there. The fucking grunters and droppers, fucking pricks.

Grunters: dudes who are lifting but sound like they're fucking

Droppers: assholes who do shoulder shrugs, deadlifts, etc, with like 400 pounds and drop that shit at its apex to the tune of a 150db spike.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 03 2015,07:04

Sometimes I grunt on the last few reps. I try to keep it down, though.... I'm not one of the scream grunters.

And I just found a previously unused muscle group.... Fuuuuuuuuck. Used to be totally paralyzed there, so at least a little is better than nothing.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 20 2015,07:59

JESUS CHRIST YOU LUMBERING ZOMBIE OLD PEOPLE STOP CUTTING IN FRONT OF ME ON THE MACHINES AND THEN PRETEND TO BE EXERSIZING BY PUSHING 20 POUNDS FOR 8 REPS

Posted by Paul on Nov. 20 2015,08:26

I avoid shopping at the supermarket on senior citizen day. Occasionally I'll forget.

They move slow, when they stop they'll park their cart at an angle and in the middle of the aisle, and they stop and talk a lot with seniors going the other direction (who park their cart in the same way), totally obstructing the aisle.

Seriously, I think they consider the choke points (where a display or whatever obstructs the path of an aisle) to be comfortable parking spot. WHY LEAVE A CART *THERE* WHEN YOU WALK OFF TO READ THROUGH THE VARIOUS LABELS DOWN THE AISLE?

I have, on multiple occasions, skipped entire aisles because the senior traffic. No grocery item is worth that hassle.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 28 2015,06:40

(GORDON @ Nov. 02 2015,21:30)

QUOTE

Actually, tomorrow I am going to start swimming laps in my lifting off-days.

I got my "bitching about old people" comeuppance in the pool this morning.

Lap lanes were about full, but there was an open lane at the far end... next to a couple girls sharing a lane, maybe 20 years old, full swim regalia, keeping logs, swimming hard, doing flip-kick turnarounds. They were swimming around and over each other like a couple dolphins, and were built like Greg Louganis, except chicks.... obviously on some swim team somewhere.

Anyway, I am doing some warm-up laps right next to them while they are doing power breast strokes, and I must have been in their wake when I turned my head to take a breath because I was still under fucking water and got lungs full of water.

So in this scenario, I guess I was the old person.

Posted by Vince on Nov. 28 2015,16:11

Now that I'm in the middle of nowhere and doing all kinds of heavy physical labor around the property I'm starting to realize how stupid we probably look to our ancestors. They'd have to be thinking we're way lazy to have enough extra energy during the day to spend it accomplishing nothing like we do. And to actually pay someone else to do it.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 28 2015,16:14

Yeah but they didn't have internet.

And neither do you most of the time! Wink.

Posted by Malcolm on Nov. 28 2015,16:17

Our ancestors also had polio. The "good old days" weren't always good.

Posted by Vince on Nov. 28 2015,16:21

This is true, which might be why the thought crossed my mind where as it might not have 6 months ago.

Had to come check email because the creek is out (so no hunting) and it's been raining all day. Went to Paducah and bought some TEOTWAWKI supplies, but needed to come take care of things. Found a company to process my two does, but they seem to waste a LOT of meat. Didn't get back nearly the amount I did from the place that processed them in Memphis. So bought a table and bone saw and meat grinder and will process our future deer myself. Last day of modern rifle season, so might not be able to get any more unless I pick up a muzzle loader or get one with the crossbow before the end of the year.

I've actually been saying, "The crick is out" all day today.

Posted by Malcolm on Nov. 28 2015,16:32

You need a crossbow? Our ancestors only had a spear and an atlatl.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 28 2015,16:56

I've always had the urge to ambush a deer and plunge a hunting knife into its heart.

Posted by GORDON on Nov. 28 2015,17:00

But seriously, speaking of our ancestors, civilization only got off the ground when technology reached the point where 1 person could produce enough food for 2 people.... leaving that second person free to do things other than produce food, like making pottery, or building houses, or building boats, or designing iPads. We're so far away from that, though, where even 1 in 1000 people need to do actual labor to survive, that we've probably reached some kind of tipping point. If only 1 American in 10k can live off the land if they had to, will there be enough people to survive the time of chaos when the grocery store shelves go bare? Dunno.

Posted by Malcolm on Nov. 28 2015,17:45

The point of civilization is making it so that shit happens less or not at all. I don't have time to learn to be a survivalist, have a job, etc. Just like I don't have time to learn pharma or apothecary to make medicine if that shit goes down. I'm not a professional UO mule.

Posted by TheCatt on Nov. 28 2015,18:13

(GORDON @ Nov. 28 2015,20:00)

QUOTE

If only 1 American in 10k can live off the land if they had to, will there be enough people to survive the time of chaos when the grocery store shelves go bare? Dunno.

According to a book I just read, no.

Posted by Vince on Dec. 01 2015,10:21

The US will be about 90% Amish after that.

Posted by Malcolm on Dec. 01 2015,10:30

(Vince @ Dec. 01 2015,12:21)

QUOTE

The US will be about 90% Amish after that.

I'll go Mosquito Coast before I go Amish.

Posted by GORDON on Dec. 01 2015,10:44

Can you imagine how many guns are going to be stockpiled in the USA after the 90% killoff?

Posted by GORDON on Dec. 05 2015,07:05

So I am doing laps this morning.

Three lanes were roped off for laps, and peeps were using the other "lanes" for whatever.... generally open swim, but a few of us were also doing laps. Two old fat bitches were in the first 2 lanes, just fucking talking across the divider. I kept an eye on the lanes to see when I could jump in them, I get tired of dodging people just floating in the open area, on noodles, bicycling up and down the lanes super fucking slow, pretending to exercise. I saw the same fat old bitch in lane 1 just chatting up 3 different old people in lane 2, one at a time, and I saw her do maybe 2 laps the entire time. She ought to be banned for fucking life.

Posted by TheCatt on Dec. 05 2015,07:33

Our pool is pretty good about kicking out non-lap swimmers from the lanes. Maybe bring it up with the gym?

Posted by Malcolm on Dec. 05 2015,10:21

Back when my gym had an indoor track, the bane of my day was trying to pass by the old motherfucking women, and it was ALWAYS exclusively old women moving so slowly that fucking starfish would outrun them, up to once every thirty seconds as they mistook talking for walking. Shit like that is why, "Respect your elders," is laughable. You don't get respect for being old. You might get some if you don't act like an oblivious douche all the time.

Posted by GORDON on Dec. 05 2015,17:57

I've decided that next time fat old bitches are just talking in the lap lanes, they are getting cannonballed followed by some extremely obnoxious lane sharing as I splashy swim past them. It didn't occur to me this morning because being a dick is not in my nature, but it would be probably the simplest solution to the problem.

Posted by GORDON on Dec. 08 2015,15:52

Went 2 hours later today due to the kid's school having a fog delay, so I got to see all new people in the gym.

+++

Outside of the track there's an area for pilates and stretching, so 3 4'x6' mats are provided that one can grab, lay down on the floor wherever, and do your stretching or whatever. Some big fat dude had 2 of them laid out side by side so he could have a 6'x8' surface to lay there and be fat. The 3rd mat was in use as well. Fuck you, huge fat guy.

++++

So I was going to grab a 45 pound dumbbell and hit one of the open benches and do some tricep/lat pullovers, and as I was going to grab it some bald dick grabbed both of them. Fine, I grabbed a 50. It was time to advance, anyway. So I do my first set with the 50, and he comes up and starts grabbing it and says "Dude can I borrow that?" I said, "You want to take the dumbbell I am using right now?" He says, "Yeah I need it for literally one second." Bemused by his dumbass use of "literally" I just let him take it, watched him for about 4 seconds, then just went back and grabbed the 45 I wanted in the first place. When he was done with the 2 50s, I noticed he passed them off to the other guy he was lifting with. "Literally one second." Fuck you.

Posted by GORDON on Dec. 22 2015,18:14

I coined an awesome phrase today, but you have to read to the end to see what it was.

+++++

So I've always thought of the ancient, fat people pretending to work-out up in my gym as "zombies," because they lumber from machine to machine (usually cutting me right the fuck off), and pretend to lift stuff, then move on not really having done anything but slow me down. And that's fine. They'll be dead soon anyway.

But today I went in to do my laps in the pool.... and I learned that when the local schools break for christmas vacation, all of their swimming teams meet in my pool to do their training, right at the time when I am coming in for lap swim. Instead of the typical "3 lanes roped off/the rest is open swim," they had the entire pool roped off for lanes, high school kids were kicking ass in all of them except one, and the last open lane was for shlubs like me. And that's kinda fine. These kids were impressive, 5 or 6 of them to a lane, swimming twice as fast as me, and were already at it for 90 minutes when I finally got to the pool, and none of the little shits were breathing hard.

Anyway, "Lap swim" was scheduled to end at 10:30, when it was time for an "old lady water aerobics" class to start.... when the old fat people get in the pool and pretend to exercise while socializing.

Now, I've mentioned this before, the old fuckers will take it upon themselves and start closing off lanes early, usually at about 10:15, even though their class doesn't start until 10:30. Typically they start moving the ropes, sometimes when I am actually in the lane, so they have max space to get in the pool to socialize before their official class/socialization hour starts. But today, they had 6 lanes of kids power swimming, and at 10:15 the old people in bathing suits were just all sort of standing at the pool edge slack jawed, looking stupid as well as old and fat, not quite sure how to take over the pool early. Half of them went to the benches to sit down and wait. About 10 of them decided to get in the pool anyway, in my lane, and just stand there staring at the other swimmers. In my lane. Where I was doing laps. Just standing there.

Mother god damned fuckers. It was at that time I though to myself, "I am overrun by The Floating Dead."

++++

I'm not sure my anger toward these people is so irrational, anymore.

Posted by Malcolm on Dec. 22 2015,19:12

Some people live to their dying day. Some wait to die.

Posted by GORDON on Dec. 31 2015,07:34

This morning I was looking around trying to decide which of the people in the gym just shouldn't be there. One should analyze one's perceptions and understand why one thinks as one does.

I think if you are older than 65 and more than 100 pounds overweight, it's too late for you and you had decades in which you let yourself go and it is time to accept the inevitable... you are not going to change your diet at this point, you are going to die old and fat, and you should try to not be in other peoples way while on your way out the door.

And while that mean attitude may not apply to all of them, I bet a dollar it easily applies to 49 out of 50. Just stay home, old fat people.

Posted by Vince on Dec. 31 2015,07:45

If this a paying membership gym, just keep in mind that they're helping pay for the equipment you're using. Not saying they aren't annoying. Just that they are paying for the privilege to be annoying.

Posted by GORDON on Dec. 31 2015,07:49

(Vince @ Dec. 31 2015,10:45)

QUOTE

This is a YMCA that allows medicare to pay the membership fee if you are elderly. Out here in the boonies it is my only option for a gym.

Posted by GORDON on Dec. 31 2015,07:51

I *know* my perceptions of old people are getting jaded by living with my MIL, who also does not accept the fact she is at the end of her life. Hell, I got seriously pissed this morning when I heard an old woman acting/yelling "Help!" on a Life Alert radio commercial, and talking about how she felt bad because she thought her kids and grandkids would have a hard time going on without her.

Bullshit, lady.

Posted by Troy on Dec. 31 2015,08:31

I've been living in a part of the country that has very few children or old people for 6-7 years now. It's always a revelation to go out of midtown and see the rest of the countries demographic. We are driving west to SF in 2 weeks. It'll probably be a culture shock at most of the restaurants and hotel along the way through middle America.

What does your kid think of the MIL Gordo - Loving, generous, grandma? Smart but mildly racist grandma(this was me)? Clueless stubborn sociopath grandma?

Posted by GORDON on Dec. 31 2015,11:07

(Troy @ Dec. 31 2015,11:31)

QUOTE

Clueless stubborn sociopath grandma?

It isn't good... I do my best to remind him to be patient with her, she's old and can't help it, and she wont be with us forever (one way or another (or another), she will not be here longer than 5 years). It is a good thing we finished the attic for him so he has his own space away from her. Between her and my wife there is a lot of... acid... in the house, so I do my best to be the base.

Posted by Malcolm on Dec. 31 2015,11:45

QUOTE

she will not be here longer than 5 years

You just added on about 20 years to her life.

Posted by thibodeaux on Dec. 31 2015,15:34

(GORDON @ Dec. 31 2015,10:34)

QUOTE

This morning I was looking around trying to decide which of the people in the gym just shouldn't be there. One should analyze one's perceptions and understand why one thinks as one does.

Motherfucker curling in the squat rack with---I shit you not--- FIVE FUCKING POUNDS on each side of the bar. That's a grand total of a whopping FIFTY FIVE POUNDS. Sure am glad he's using the squat rack; he might hurt hisself with that insane weight.

Posted by TPRJones on Jan. 01 2016,00:00

(GORDON @ Dec. 31 2015,13:07)

QUOTE

It is a good thing we finished the attic for him so he has his own space away from her.

Oh? I thought you had the MIL upstairs. For exercise.

That and to set up a plausible scenario to reduce questions, should it become necessary.

Posted by GORDON on Jan. 05 2016,08:19

Was getting changed to do some laps this morning and this 75 year old guy is weighing himself and gets off and says to me, "Huzzah! Down 4 pounds!" And I said, "Hey, good for you, old timer." And he said, "Yeah well that's with no clothes though!" And I said, "Still counts!"

So see? I don't universally hate all old people around me, just the ones not doing the work.

Posted by GORDON on Jan. 05 2016,08:32

So these fucking fuck old people closed off the lap lanes early again, today. Pulled the fucking rope across the pool literally right behind me, at 10:10. Lap swim is supposed to go until 10:30 when their old-people-socialization hour starts. Three of us lap swimmers had to cram into one lane, and one of us was gigantic and was taking up 60% of the width of the lane all by himself (it wasn't me).

I really want to bitch about it, but the people who work at this place all know me by name and I feel like if I bitch about the elderly they will know me by name and also think I am a piece of shit.

Posted by GORDON on Jan. 06 2016,12:36

I shit you not:

Wasn't in the pool today but I glanced down from the windows in the gym overlooking the pool, and saw a new face: this huge woman, 250 pounds, maybe three hondo, floating in the deep end on a noodle, and she had her huge fucking sippy mug in the water with her while she chatted with the woman next to her.

I love the Resolutioners.

I can't believe the teenage life guard didn't say anything to her.

Posted by Malcolm on Jan. 06 2016,12:42

I always wonder about the people who are reading as they workout. If you can do that while exercising, you aren't moving enough.

Posted by GORDON on Jan. 06 2016,16:02

I'm not sure what amused me more, her Sip or the noodle. It isn't like she couldn't possibly sink with that much blubber.

Posted by GORDON on Jan. 06 2016,17:05

This morning while working out my mind was wandering, as it does. I was thinking about those Planet Fitness commercials that are selling the "No Lunk" angle... you can be a regular person and go there and not worry about seeing people who are serious about fitness. I hadn't given it enough thought to have an opinion... it was just a thing I was aware of... but for some reason today I started analyzing it.

It is insulting to people who like working out, and also brilliant... it is catering to the people who don't actually want to work out. No wear-and-tear on their machines. Hell, these are probably the people I mentioned who are signing up the first week in january... "this is the year I turn it around!"... then don't use the membership from February-October.

I did a little googling, and it turns out I am late to the party... lifters have already given PF a lot of shit, and even Slate... the hippie rag... took them to task.

< http://www.slate.com/article....ol.html >

I didn't know Planet Fitness gave away free pizza on Mondays. Brilliant. I also didn't know there was an alarm that goes off if you grunt too loud. It truly is a gym for people who don't want to go to a gym.

Posted by Malcolm on Jan. 06 2016,17:48

QUOTE

I also didn't know there was an alarm that goes off if you grunt too loud.

Really?

Posted by thibodeaux on Jan. 07 2016,03:53

If you think about the economics of the gym: they make their money off people who don't go.

Posted by TPRJones on Jan. 07 2016,04:14

< If Gyms Were Honest > from Cracked.

Posted by Troy on Jan. 14 2016,07:19

Today is my last day at work in ATL before we head out to SF.
Yesterday I started packing up my desk. Put my laptop docking station, a few random odds and ends, calculator, nothing major, in it, and then got caught up in a last minute project. I left the box in the middle of my cube to finish up the next day.

Came in this AM and janitorial people had thrown my box away. SHIT. I want to get mad and them, but the company will replace the important stuff and I guess it did look like I had a box of crap in the middle of my desk space.

The most significant loss - my Swingline stapler. This is what set Milton off. I feel for the guy.

Posted by Malcolm on Jan. 14 2016,07:26

Did they find your flasks?

Posted by Troy on Jan. 14 2016,07:26

(Malcolm @ Jan. 14 2016,10:26)

QUOTE

Did they find your flasks?

Na - took the alcohol and my grinder home last week.

Posted by GORDON on Jan. 14 2016,09:28

And here we are, closing out the second week of the new year, and this morning in the gym there were more trainers standing around than there were people who came in to exercise. I guess the gym can ease off the staffing, now.

See you next year! Thanks for subsidizing my gym membership!

I can't help but think I am partially to blame for not hugging all the new people when they started. I probably discouraged them.... but hey, the gym is for physical fitness, not emotional well being. If you're having problems with your mental health, go see a shrink and stop doing curls on the squat rack.

Not directed at anyone here, of course. Just putting it out into the universe.

Posted by Malcolm on Jan. 14 2016,09:31

The parking lot at my joint is still filling up about an hour ahead of what I'm used to. Typically takes the entire month of January before it calms down.

QUOTE

I can't help but think I am partially to blame for not hugging all the new people when they started.

I think you'd discourage them more by hugging.

Posted by GORDON on Jan. 25 2016,16:04

Gym was PACKED this morning, more people than even right after New Year's. The stairmasters were groaning under the stress. Fat content was WAY up. Delayed resolutioners?

Posted by Leisher on Jan. 25 2016,19:43

Probably folks who wanted to avoid the early rush.

Posted by GORDON on Jan. 26 2016,08:11

That place isn't going to know what's up when I disappear for 10 days in June on a father/son scuba road trip. They're going to be all "Where the fuck is GORDON? His dedication really motivates me."

Posted by Malcolm on Jan. 26 2016,08:15

(GORDON @ Jan. 26 2016,10:11)

QUOTE

That place isn't going to know what's up when I disappear for 10 days in June on a father/son scuba road trip. They're going to be all "Where the fuck is GORDON? His dedication really motivates me."

You can tell all the locker room buddies you spent a few days going down with other guys.

Posted by GORDON on Feb. 06 2016,05:54

Fuck you, old people, loading up the pool during lap swim with your numerous flotation devices and turtle-like movements. Fuck you all.

Posted by GORDON on Mar. 03 2016,18:53

So the other day I go up to the gym, and there's a chair there that I sit on for 30 seconds while I get my earbuds and gloves and shit on, out of my bag. With my fucked up feet I have a hard time standing still and doing shit like that so I like sitting on that chair to do it.

Anyway, I get up there and this fat old guy is slumped in the chair with a blood pressure cuff on his arm and a pulse monitor on his finger with wires running to some device he was carrying. Eyes closed, not moving. He was in my spot so of course I hoped he was fucking dead.... I am usually in a foul mood in the mornings.

Anyway, I went elsewhere and hung up my jacket and shit, and then some other fucking old person was in my usual stretching spot on the wall... wished death on them... and my backup spot had a view of the fat guy so I took a secret pic. He still hadn't moved. As I stretched I was looking at him, not flinching. About 5 minutes after I took that pic one of the trainers noticed him, and woke him up or whatever the fuck, and helped him up, and helped him the fuck out of there.

Jesus christ.

And sometimes in the pool when it is full of the floating dead being in my way I wish Death, the literal incarnation of Death, would hear my thoughts and sweep over the water laying his icy gaze upon all of them, and then give me a nod for the "heads up" as he returned to the ether. I would push their floating corpses out of my lane and finish my laps, and I would sleep very well that night.

My mother-in-law is really making me hate the elderly.