Forum: General Stuff
Topic: Words that indicate the speaker is a douche.
started by: GORDON
Posted by GORDON on Jul. 20 2010,11:03
Been noticing a few key words and phrases lately used when someone is trying hard to be a douche.

Word: "Narrative."

Usage: "The Tea Party narrative is that the Arizona anti-Mexican laws are about order, not racism."

Reason the user is a douche: The person who uses "narrative" in that sense imply that the group with whom they disagree doesn't have a valid point, only a script with a story to which they are all sticking.

That's why they are a douche.

Give your examples in the above format.  There may be a rare front page post if we get a few good ones.
Posted by TheCatt on Jul. 20 2010,11:37
Word: "so-called"

Usage: The Wake County school board has voted in favor of "so-called" neighborhood schools that critics say will resegregate schools.

Reason that user is a douche: The schools are neighborhood schools.  They are schools in neighborhoods, attended by kids in the neighborhood, supported by people who live in the neighborhood.  "so-called" is trying to convert a fact into an opinion.
Posted by GORDON on Jul. 20 2010,13:29
This one might be obvious, but

Word: "Racist."

Usage:  "They only oppose that person/policy/idea because they are racists."

Reason the user is a douche: The person doesn't like anyone having an opinion contrary his own, therefor anyone who disagrees with anything is a racist.  No qualification is ever needed to use that moniker.  If you ask, you are a racist, too.
Posted by Malcolm on Jul. 20 2010,17:19
Word: proactive

Usage: "We need to be more proactive in our approach to this solving this problem."

Reason the user is a douche: There's "active" and "passive."  Fucking pick one & don't add unnecessary prefixes to existing words to make them sound new or dynamic.

Posted by Malcolm on Jul. 20 2010,17:27
Word: compromise

Usage: "We need to reach a compromise on this contentious issue."

Reason the user is a douche: Compromise is a code word for "let's piss off everyone approximately equally so it looks fair."  Compromise involves rolling small bits of god-awfulness from diametrically opposed ideas into one large, incoherent ball of bureaucratic mediocrity.
Posted by GORDON on Jul. 20 2010,17:47
Word: "Obstructionist."

Usage: "Obstructionist Republicans in Congress are making it hard to do good work."

Reason the user is a douche: There is damned near a super majority of Democrats in Congress at the moment, and if they all thought any particular thing was a good idea then there wouldn't be shit the minority Republicans could do about it.  Referring to a minority voting block as the reason you can't get anything done is an attempt to lay blame where it isn't deserved, instead of having integrity and just owning it.

Also, see "Racists," above.

Posted by TheCatt on Jul. 20 2010,18:38
Revision to compromise:

"{blanks} need to compromise."

Translation: {blanks} need to abandon their shit and come over to our side.  Again, because we never compromise.
Posted by thibodeaux on Jul. 22 2010,15:00
Somebody do "progressive" for me.  I'm too lazy.
Posted by Malcolm on Jul. 23 2010,07:38

(thibodeaux @ Jul. 22 2010,17:00)
QUOTE
Somebody do "progressive" for me.  I'm too lazy.

Word: progressive

Usage: "The tax should be more progressive so the rich pay their fair share."

Reason the user is a douche: Going against something's that's "progressive" is obviously going against "progress," you obstructionist, racist bastard, you.  Learn to proactively compromise.
Posted by unkbill on Jul. 23 2010,15:19
"I promise" out of the mouth of any person running for any office.  You guys fill in the blanks.

Posted by thibodeaux on Jul. 26 2010,18:53
How about a phrase?  I really hate it when somebody says "Change is good."
Posted by GORDON on Jul. 26 2010,21:15
Well go for it.

The Japanese have a saying, "Consistency is power."

Posted by unkbill on Jul. 27 2010,04:12

(thibodeaux @ Jul. 26 2010,18:53)
QUOTE
How about a phrase?  I really hate it when somebody says "Change is good."

I don't know antime I get change back from a dollar I feel lucky they didn't take the whole thing.
Posted by GORDON on Sep. 15 2010,10:53

(GORDON @ Jul. 20 2010,16:29)
QUOTE
This one might be obvious, but

Word: "Racist."

Usage:  "They only oppose that person/policy/idea because they are racists."

Reason the user is a douche: The person doesn't like anyone having an opinion contrary his own, therefor anyone who disagrees with anything is a racist.  No qualification is ever needed to use that moniker.  If you ask, you are a racist, too.

This is probably still going on the front page, so I'm going to add to this:

Unless the speaker specifically says, "I hate (race)," or, "All (race) people are THIS WAY," then it isn't a racist statement.

'The poor' are not a race.

A religion is not a race.

'Southerners' are not a race.

Thinking the President of the United States is incompetent has nothing to do with the color of his skin.
Posted by TPRJones on Sep. 15 2010,14:25
Other things that are not a race: nationalities, unions, political parties, age groups, geographical regions, cities, and neighborhoods.
Posted by thibodeaux on Nov. 02 2010,05:03
"Holistic."  Does this even mean anything?

Also, I hate it when people end their emails with "any thoughts?"

God, I really hate that.

Posted by Cakedaddy on Nov. 02 2010,08:51
Why do you hate "any thoughts?"?
Posted by Malcolm on Nov. 02 2010,09:46

(thibodeaux @ Nov. 02 2010,07:03)
QUOTE
"Holistic."  Does this even mean anything?

The best way to define that word is to read < this >.
Posted by thibodeaux on Nov. 02 2010,09:53

(Cakedaddy @ Nov. 02 2010,11:51)
QUOTE
Why do you hate "any thoughts?"?

Well, it's an awful cliche, so that's one strike.

But mainly because it's such a puss-out.  Most of the time, it really means: "Can you help me, please?"  Or: "I've noticed something possibly wrong with your code."
Posted by Malcolm on Nov. 02 2010,09:59
I'll chime in with "it is what it is."  As in, "Well that feature really just is what it is."  As in, "Yeah, we know it ought to do correctly, but fuck you, this is the best you're getting."
Posted by GORDON on Nov. 02 2010,10:04
I usually say "Let me know if you see something I missed."

But I usually don't miss anything so I just say it to be humble.
Posted by thibodeaux on Nov. 12 2010,10:16
Today's word: "disenfranchised."
Posted by GORDON on Nov. 12 2010,10:23
Zoinks.

Must not be regarding ACORN.... they were in the business of hyperenfranchising people with multiple votes.

And I just made that word up, right now.  "Hyperenfranchised."
Posted by thibodeaux on Jan. 16 2011,15:06
Words/phrases that I hate:

"Comfort Food"
"Whopping"

I'm sure I'll think of some more.
Posted by thibodeaux on Jan. 25 2011,09:15
1. Planet.
2. "Giving back to the community."
Posted by GORDON on Jan. 25 2011,09:44
Planet?
Posted by thibodeaux on Jan. 25 2011,10:04
Yep.  If somebody says "planet" and they're not talking about astronomy, they're probably a douche.
Posted by Malcolm on Jan. 25 2011,10:08

(thibodeaux @ Jan. 25 2011,12:04)
QUOTE
Yep.  If somebody says "planet" and they're not talking about astronomy, they're probably a douche.

I use that in hyperbole all the time.  I suppose that's vaguely astronomy-related.
Posted by GORDON on Jan. 25 2011,10:14

(thibodeaux @ Jan. 25 2011,13:04)
QUOTE
Yep.  If somebody says "planet" and they're not talking about astronomy, they're probably a douche.

In that case, has "Green" shown up in this list, then?
Posted by thibodeaux on Jan. 25 2011,10:32
It should.
Posted by GORDON on Jan. 25 2011,10:40
I hate "green."  I even see "green" hard drives on newegg.

I am making plans to cut down another tree this coming Earth Day.
Posted by thibodeaux on Apr. 07 2011,04:05
"The Other"
Posted by TheCatt on Apr. 07 2011,06:02

(thibodeaux @ Apr. 07 2011,07:05)
QUOTE
"The Other"

Context?  Unfamiliar
Posted by thibodeaux on Apr. 07 2011,06:16
SRSLY?  Didn't you go to a hippie school?
< http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Other >
Posted by thibodeaux on Mar. 23 2012,04:55
I'm about ready to add "amazing" to the list. Especially if it's in a Facebook post.
Posted by GORDON on Oct. 27 2012,13:43
Phrase: "White people/First world problems."

Usage: Someone talk about some problem that is important to them, and someone replies with, "White people problems."

Reason the user is a douche: The person who uses that phrase is implying that whatever issue the other person has is not important on a global scale, so therefore the person must be mocked and belittled.  The person doing the belittling, though, usually doesn't give a shit about the rest of the world, but is only being a douche for the sake of being an attention whoring douche.  Using that phrase also implies a worldliness or world weariness that they just don't actually possess.  What a douche.

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